We all have subtle habits that might be sending insecurity signals that quietly scream self-doubt. Experts say these actions send mixed messages that can mislead others into thinking you’re insecure. Here are the top 7 behaviours to watch and how to replace them with confident cues. Time to identify these silent saboteurs and how to replace them with confident cues.
Table of Contents
Things That Make You Look Insecure
| Always Needing Validation |
| Saying Sorry Too Much & Undermining Yourself |
| Talking Too Much to Justify Yourself |
| Talking with Too Many Fillers That Make You Sound Uncertain |
| Shifty Eyes and Restlessness |
| Trying Too Hard to Feel Accepted |
| Hiding from Growth and Playing It Too Safe |
1. Always Needing Validation
If you’re always checking in with others before making a move, you’re slowly giving away your inner authority. Relying on others to validate your every move means you may be handing over your confidence without realising it. Experts call this habit ‘reassurance-seeking. ‘ This pattern chips away at your self-reliance. Build self-trust by making choices without the discomfort of uncertainty.
Read More: 3 Psychological Reasons Why Everyone Seems Mean to You and What To Do!
2. Saying Sorry Too Much & Undermining Yourself
When you say ‘sorry’ for things that don’t require it or brush off compliments, these habits make you seem less confident than you are. Psychologists say these habits stem from a fear of disapproval, one that helps avoid criticism but sabotages confidence. Start owning your wins without apology, without minimising them.
3. Talking Too Much to Justify Yourself
When you over-explain, they often signal doubt & look insecure. Over-sharing your thought process can tell people you might not be confident in your reasoning. Psychologists say over-explaining is a fear of being misunderstood or rejected. Say what you mean; you don’t need to prove yourself. Keep your message tight and let it stand on its own.
Read More: You Think Overthinking Means You’re Smart? Think Again
4. Talking with Too Many Fillers That Make You Sound Uncertain
Filler words like ‘uh’ or ‘you know’ can make you seem unsure that you’re not fully in control of your thoughts. Psychologists say these speech patterns can cause others to question your confidence. Filler-heavy speech often reflects inner self-doubt, but from how you say it. Practice pausing instead of filling the silence, speak clearly, and drop the question mark.
5. Shifty Eyes and Restlessness
Even if your words sound confident, crossing your arms can signal nervousness. No matter how solid your message is, even when your words are clear and accurate. Practice grounding yourself, relaxing your shoulders, and slowing your movements. Remember: steady eye contact and steady eye contact go a long way.
Read More: 7 Psychological Tools To Strengthen Your Emotional Health After 60!
6. Trying Too Hard to Feel Accepted
Telling bigger stories, constantly complimenting others, or always saying yes comes from a need to be liked, not respected. At the root, these habits are about seeking approval; it lives in your ability to be real. Stop trying to be liked, just out-authenticate.
7. Hiding from Growth and Playing It Too Safe
Staying in your comfort zone might feel safe, but I don’t believe in myself enough to try. Hiding from hard things doesn’t make them disappear, but it doesn’t build your confidence. Experts say avoiding discomfort strengthens the moments that grow resilience and self-belief.
Read More: These 10 hidden signs reveal who someone really is, says Psychologist!
Frequently Asked Questions
What are the signs that I might seem insecure to others?
You might seem insecure if you apologise often, if you use lots of filler words, or avoid tough situations.
What’s wrong with using words like “uh” or “you know”?
Filler words make you seem less certain, can make your message feel weak or unclear.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice.
